I was just talking to Steve about this girl sitting opposite us who looked interesting. She had on an outfit which normal students would never wear and was very gypsy-like. Guess what Steve said? "She looks cheap." Okay, to be fair gypsies have often be regarded as loose women who generally fuck around but still! The girl wasn't even wearing revealing clothes and just had a very different style (hence my slight interest in observing her).
I remember a similar conversation I had with another guy on this pretty looking girl who is my classmate... that she was an easy fuck. Apparently a friend of his had fucked and dumped her while she was serious about him. Now, I don't mind the whole fuck-and-dump routine per se, but come on! At least make it clear that nothing serious is gonna come out of the relationship.
What pisses me off about these guys is the fact that girls can't fuck around. What, you think just because we're girls we don't want to play around and fuck other people just for the sake of pleasure? While guys can go sow their stupid seeds and be labeled "player" the only label women like that end up with is the word "slut". I'm not saying that I would sleep around with any guy, but why not girls? I would hardly think that the guys who fucked around had any deep relationship with the girl, so why is it so wrong for women to sleep around for fun?
Imagine a situation like this: Girl meets guy in a club and is attracted to him. They go back to his place and have sex. Girl wakes up in the morning and just goes home satisfied after a good fuck. One day, Girl meets Guy in university and they realize that the world is friggin' small. Guy then tells all his guy friends that Girl is an easy lay.
What, you mean girls are not allowed to enjoy sex now? Just thinking about it gets me annoyed. I don't know about you, but I think girls who fuck around just for pleasure are admirable. Not all of them, but it's nice when you find women in Malaysia having such liberal thoughts about sex. Over here, all the guys I know are just into sweet, innocent-looking females. You know, those typical size 0 girls with boring, long straight hair, typical Chinese looks, and who don't seem to speak up about anything at all. Stupid.
emotional
5:07 AM
Fucking bosses and their fucking hypocrisies. I had this "talk" with Darren today about how he wants me to be more "committed and have a lot of sincerity" in the way I do things. He started giving me examples about how Joey and him both have that, and they love the job, blah blah blah whilst I tried to focus on his exact point and purpose. I don't know how "committed" Darren is, but I'll say this much about Joey: She's only committed when she wants to be, and when she chooses to be.
Let's take for example a customer who orders less than RM100 during the dinner hours... What kind of expressions do they get from her? A face that doesn't smile, and extremely bad service. Just say that particular customer orders the 4-course saver set. What they can expect is dessert that arrives even before the main course is done with, or even half done with. The plates are set for dessert, and the customer looks at you dumbfounded and wondering why the fuck you're setting for dessert when they're not even done eating the main meal. That's what you get. This is not a fucking dining experience, and all the crap about how good service is what you want to provide is bull.
Another illustration: I had a chat with one customer who was waiting for her daughter and she asked me if Joey was around. She then continued to remark that Joey's performance can only be described as temperamental (her words). Her service is great some days, shitty on others (again, her words; minus 'shitty' of course).
At this point in the discussion, with Darren beating around the bush instead of coming out and saying whatever the hell he wants to, I just asked him pointedly: "We're obviously having this 'conversation' because my performance thus far is less than satisfactory to you. So why don't you point out which aspect of it is, and I'll rectify it." (I was tired of him beating the fucking bush to death, I've had less than 3 hours of sleep, and I was fed up of someone saying there's nothing wrong with me and yet implying that it is, although still refusing to directly address whatever the issue is.) His answer: "I don't think there's anything problematic about you. All I'm saying is for you to have more communication." So what? I don't communicate?
Darren then continues to say that we should all try to suck up to the bosses (my words). How he put it was this: You need the bosses to have a good impression of you, so in order to achieve that you need to put in extra effort. I'm not asking you to offer me a mug of beer out of the blue, but eventually do it." What the fuck? Just bluntly say that yes, suck up to me. I don't mind you saying that, I really don't. But what I hate is you trying to make something appear different than what it is. A spade's a spade. Sucking up is sucking up, no matter what fancy fucking language you use. Fuck him, I don't even know what the fuck he wants. First, he tries to make it all sound like we're adults who "respect each other" and crap like that, and how we can talk to each other about things... but do you know he fires people simply because they justify their fucking actions? Your fucking "respect" is worth so little if you won't even listen to other people. I naturally pointed out that there would always be a certain barrier, for want of a better word, simply because you're the boss and I'm the staff (duh, who the fuck doesn't know that) like... everybody behaves differently in front, and you don't really loosen up first. The one who does that is the boss, because he has a higher authority to do so. I mean, can you imagine if you start joking with your boss and then bam! he turns at you and frowns, saying that you're rude? The one to make the first move should always be the boss, just so you know where you stand, you know what I mean?
The best part was when he started saying about how we had to love the food to recommend it etc and if there was "even a seed of doubt, then it won't sell." He then asked me if there was any such doubt in my situation, and I sat there contemplating if I should tell him that the desserts are horrible. So horrible that I wouldn't buy it even if it was 5 bucks. Hell, the only dessert I would take would be ice cream because hey, it's from fucking Walls. You can't ruin it, can you? That's why I never say that the desserts are good, because they fucking aren't. The one thing I hate about Darren is the fact that he doesn't spit out what he wants to say. He just keeps going round and round, like he doesn't even know what the focus is. He's asking me to be more vocal, but doesn't listen to me when I'm vocal, so it's just a whole lot easier to simply agree with whatever the hell he's saying (and I wanted to get home by that time).
Enough ranting, my steam is more or less gone already, replaced only with nausea because my stomach can't keep heavy food down and I still have "dinner" to eat.
emotional
9:10 AM
On occasion, you get customers who like to show off and act as though they're smarter than you. We had one such customer today, what was most hilarious was when he ordered a glass of the house white to my colleague.
"What kind of wine is this?"
"It's chardonnay, sir."
"I know it's chardonnay, but there are many kinds of chardonnay, aren't they?"
"I'm not sure what you mean, sir."
"I know your mother is a woman. But your mother could be Chinese, Indian, Malay etc. Just like Chardonnay, there are many variations: sauvignon blanc etc."
At which point of the story I just went "WTF?" That guy is an idiot. There are many variations to white wine, and chardonnay is one of them. Among the others would be sauvignon blanc and pinot blanc that I know of (my wine knowledge is very limited, I know). As far as it goes, the most customers would ask is what kind of grapes are used. Never have I ever heard a customer go: "What kind of chardonnay is this?"
It's fucking La Joya 2005 Chadonnay from Chile, you dumb fuck. Go back to wine school and stop trying to act like some smarty pants when you only come across as an idiot. How many kinds of fucking Chardonnay do you think we have anyway? Sauvignon blanc is NOT a part of chardonnay, it's falls under the white wine group, not chardonnay, dumbass. Know your facts before you start out trying to impress your girlfriend, seriously.
Another kind of customer would be the ones who hear what others say and not understanding a single word, repeat the same thing to the waiter (or in my case, waitress). One example would be pesto sauce. It simply means cooked in aglio e olio (not exactly, but in simple terms) but do they know this? Of course not. Don't recite things you don't know the fuck about. We don't have fancy pesto sauce, in fact, we don't really serve it. What comes the closest to it would be pasta cooked in extra virgin olive oil. Your friend probably didn't try pesto in the restaurant, either that or he just thinks he did because we don't bloody have it on our menu. Like I said, we only have olio pasta so deal with it. Don't kick up a fuss just because you said pesto (without knowing what it is) and it turns out to be not what you expected.
emotional
8:08 AM
Four people came into the bar section of the restaurant, the women ordering white wine while debating on the pros and cons of getting a bottle. They finally settled on glasses and I left them at it. In comes 2 other friends of theirs, and the other woman decides to order white wine as well. The other two women start to get excited and suggest opening a bottle.
"Can we change our orders to a bottle of white wine instead of glasses?"
"Uh... let me just check with the bar if the drinks have been poured."
I spot the bartender putting in the last few drops of wine into the second glass and lets the table know. Girls look around table in that I-want-a-friggin-bottle-of-wine kinda way.
"Is it possible for you to pour back the wine?"
"I'm sorry, but we can't do that."
Are you really asking me to pour back wine into the bottle and let other people drink it? Do you little bitches like drinking recycled wine yourselves?
"Is Darren in?"
No, he fucking isn't. And prissy little white wine drinkers like you ain't gonna get special treatment just because you know the owner. Everybody knows Darren, if you have the cash, I'll even give you his number. But until then, stop asking for extra white wine on the house and the best seats because frankly, we just don't give a shit that you know Darren.
Another group of six comes in, consisting of middle-aged couples desperately trying to show off their latest diamond rings and trips off to the South of France. I take their order and when the food arrives, announces it to the table for the man who ordered it.
"Excuse me sir, your spaghetti with bacon and meatballs."
I get a blank look from the man.
"Who ordered spaghetti with bacon?"
Whole table looks confusedly back at me.
"Sir, YOUR spaghetti with bacon."
emotional
9:17 AM
A perfect example of the Muslims' idea of justice: The bounty on Salman Rushdie's head. Reading the article on it just the other day made me enraged at the idea of such ridiculous notions of upholding religious justice. If you want to know more, just read
this.In case you're lazy, I'll sum it up. A book titled "The Satanic Verses" caused major controversy because apparently Rushdie had insulted the Muslim religion to the extent where the Prophet's wives were called whores etc. Iran's leader, having a major stick up his ass was pissed off that his god was insulted in such a way and called a death order to Rushdie, urges all "zealous Muslims" to kill the man if they ever see him or find someone who can do it if they can't. In fact, these stupid little bastards ended up killing translators of the book and keep issuing little notices and announcements stating that they would like to murder Rushdie. How perfectly fucking ridiculous.
Now you'll hear my say on it. Would you shoot a man because he said God was a bloody little prick who knows jackshit? I might be angry, but it's a little overboard to say, stab the man to death simply for making a statement like that. Do you see religious groups
ordering their people to start killing everyone who say a single negative word against their beliefs (with the exception of Muslims, of course)? The part which I hated the most is that no one is allowed to insult the Islamic religion. Are we not allowed to mouth opinions? Apparently not in Islamic cases. What we are supposed to do is nod our heads and say "Oh, yes. Would you like me to go down on you again?" Fucking little whoresons. I'm sorry, but these people (and countries) deserve a big ol' "Fuck you" in their faces and a shot in the face, before they come after you with their 'parang' and whatnot. To impose their ideas and principles, not allowing differing opinions, and squealing about how we aren't respectful of their religion just makes me want to turn my back and ignore them for the rest of my life, amidst all the uproar. Someone should just say "shut the fuck up and sit down; you're in my country, play by my rules or I'll have your brain sautéed and served." What kind of fucked up asshole goes around killing innocent people for publishing the bloody book? Translating it? Being involved in it?
Archaic beliefs like these just makes me even more convinced that the asshole who issued such orders has a major superiority complex, can't take criticism, and has a huge tennis racket up his ass going "fuck me, fuck me".
emotional
8:54 AM
I've been feeling pretty low as of late. There's a sense of numbness in everything, and whatever laughter that comes just fades quickly and is so temporary. It's difficult to crack a smile unless my mind is diverted, and even that doesn't happen too often. My movements are slow and sluggish, every limb protesting against active movement so contrasting with my emotions. Every deep breath I take ends with a sigh, and my tears threaten to fall every time I close my eyes. I feel exhausted, but every time I feel like giving in my reluctance holds and I just can't let go.
I don't need a hug, I just need the inner strength to give a shrug and say to hell with it all.
emotional
10:19 AM
I had a really dumb customer today, and it's pretty laughable except that he probably won't be coming back to the restaurant ever again. Here's how the conversation went:
I had already taken his girlfriend's order.Me: What will you be having?
Him: Is your bacon pork?
Me: Yes.
Him: Oh okay. How about your meatballs?
Me: It also has pork in it.
Him: What do you have in the menu that doesn't contain pork?
Me: You can try the mushrooms or the mix seafood pasta.
Him
(talking to his girlfriend): I think I'll eat a salad.
Him
(to me): I'll have the Caesar Salad.
Me: Erm... That one also has pork bacon in it.
Him: Fine. What do you recommend for me to have that doesn't have pork in it?
Me: Well, you can try the Chef's Salad or the Bread Salad, those are vegetarian. Or if you want pasta you can try the baked cheese prawns pasta, it's our chef's specialty.
Him: I don't take pork.
Me: Yeah, these are prawns.
Him: I can't take pork, I'm allergic to it.
Me: Err, yeah... prawns don't have pork in them.
Him: Okay fine, I'll have one of that.
At that point in the conversation, I was practically about to ask him if he was allergic to cheese as well. The best part was when the bill came.
I presented the bill to him.Him: Holy shit, the pasta costs 45 bucks.
I smile politely to him (the bill amounted to RM95)Him
(looks incredulous): Shit, I don't have enough money. I only have 30 bucks with me. I can't believe the pasta costs 45 bucks. Looks like you'll have to pay for dinner second time in a row.
Girlfriend takes out 65 bucks.
I discreetly count the money to make sure there's enough.
Him
(looks a little pissed off, in sarcastic voice): Why? Didn't I put the money correctly?
Me: Nope, the amount is correct.
Forces self to smile and walk away acting not pissed off when I really am. You know, I felt a little bad for the guy but it's his fault for not checking the price of the pasta in the first place. And besides, who the hell brings someone to a restaurant and brings only 30 bucks if he's supposed to be spending on someone else as well?
emotional
9:00 AM
